We hear all the time what to do to prepare our kids for dealing with bullies. But what if it’s your child who does the bullying?
We know that we have to build their confidence so that they stand a chance and make a stand against a bully.
We think of all the ways possible to teach our children to stand up for what is right, and help someone if they are being bullied.
I’ve noticed, since my daughter became middle school age, she has learned to develop a greater sense of responsibility for her self and her own decisions.
It’s challenging for her age group to navigate friendships, school responsibilities, home responsibilities, and their own individuality. They truly need all the guidance they can get, even though they think they have it all figured out!
My husband and I have had many conversations with our daughter about being a good friend and a good role model. And we thought that she understood how to apply it. But there have certainly been situations that she has made the wrong decision, and had to re-learn how to be a better friend the next time she gets the opportunity.
This is a crucial time for kids to learn how to be good and decent people. Mamas, don’t– for one second– think that your parenting job ends after a discussion or two, because just as it has in your life, your child will deal with circumstances more than once.
In one particular case, my daughter chose to follow the lead of someone who was being very unfair to another girl. Emma was not even aware that what was happening was actually an act of bullying. Instead of diffusing the situation or choosing a different path with good logic and reasoning skills, she went along for the ride.
I am blessed to have been able to cultivate the kind of relationship with Emma where she can truly tell me anything, and she knows it is judgement free. I work on our relationship constantly… I don’t take my job lightly!
When she came home from school that day, and told me what the girls had done, I CALMLY shared my disappoint and pointed out her role in upsetting the other friend. Together, we identified different things to clue into so that a similar circumstance can be dealt with differently. She also went to school the next day equipped with ideas to make her friend feel included.
It’s so important to address the bullying issue with our kiddos and be prepared to deal with it on either end- the bully or the victim.
If your kids have had any experience with bullies, or were being the bully themselves, how did you handle it?